while the stars be not darkened either

inside the remains of a broken past

there's a new wing growing
where once there was a lead weight
with a new eye i see
twenty years of addiction disolving
a history revealed
by a stable home
the unexpected end came with no hello

it started with a broken cup
a painful word
and no trust
a broken childhood
and no education
i ran away
through the keyhole

i found a world in sidereality
that was populated by lost souls
looking for love and destruction
the possibility of a quick end
where age would be heavy
inside a single glance
filled with desire

it turned from a taste
to a greedy feast
until only the best
or the new would be good enough
but a hungry mind
had to be fed with the available scraps
or there would be nothing

it hurt so bad
but i thought this was life
when he did not say yes
and he was in the same pit
and he created a wall
it seemed there was no other way
and so it went on

one after another
each false sanctuary died
and we were all lost without them
pushing for new depths
new drugs showed me
how unreal everything was
when the morning light sent me to sleep

what happened in these twenty years
and how did i survive them
i wonder if this is the end of words
my fragile reality now
is created by a warm soul
that holds the real me
and shows me who i am

i could have seen the painful
and it would have crushed me
if i did not know this today
i could not sit here now
with a peaceful heart
so i am thankful to the darkness
and lock it inside my own past